Remember When...

Rose, in the movie Titanic, told Jack she'd never let go: "I'll never let go, Jack. I promise."

Never, never, never ever would she let go. She promised. We all heard it.

What did she do next? She sure didn't take a good look around and realize there was plenty of room for both of them on that fucking door she was laying on.

Oh, no. She pried Jack's bluish white hand out of hers and let him sink. Really, Rose!? You'll never let go?

'Bo-o! Rose didn't mean it like that.' I can hear what you're thinking. Titanic was a treasure, breaking records and packing theaters. But, come on. I know it was meant to be a tear-jerking moment, but that shit was hilarious.

If my wife said those words to me, I'd expect her to cut my hand off at the wrist and take it with her, regardless of how holding my severed hand at Thanksgiving dinner was received.

We're so willing to fall for the stupidest shit sometimes. When it comes to engaging an audience and making them feel something, don't make characters write checks they can't cash. It comes across more as a what-the-fuck-was-that moment, distracting from the gentle tug on the heartstrings.

Remember when "you had me at hello"? That check cleared.